I went with a good friend to visit her mother in hospital last week. her mother asked for prayer for her illness, which we both agreed. However after coming back from the cafeteria to get her a snack, she said: "well I spoke with your sister and we both agree, if you pray for me, you can ONLY pray to jesus, not those "funny gods" of yours."

I almost has to pick her daughter off the floor before she fainted. I asked her mother what difference would it make since these were prayers on her behalf. She answered with; "well I want to make sure she prays to a "real god." At that point the atmosphere became chilled, and she kissed her mother goodbye, and we left. Her daughter was un tears when we got back to my place. She asked what could she do. In forming her that mother made a clear choice, that in my opinion. not to pray for her at all. Just visit, be nice and neutral about it. Her other sister who happens to be agnostic agreed with me.

What are your opinions? Has this ever happened to you?

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Never happened to me.  But i can say that keeping it neutral and keeping religious aspects out of it would be the best bet in this situation.

I do think consent is important for prayer or any kind of energy work, etc... I had experiences with my sister and her new age circles putting me in their reiki grids without my knowing or consent and it brought about the results they were going for with much suffering to me.  They had good intentions but consent matters.  Also, I don't ask everyone, even close to me, to pray or send energy because if they are struggling with their own negativity, it can taint their efforts and affect me, it is nothing personal.  I do feel for the girl in this situation however, that would be hard.  She can leave out prayer and just focus on loving her mother for her own peace of mind.

It also depends on the dynamics or their relationship and each person's needs.  I set boundaries for my well being because of my sensitivity.  I feel energy as much as touch and wouldn't want to be touched without consent either.  Some might not care either way.  Honesty is also important to me, so if someone had an alternative solution or compromise I'd expect them to present it to me first.  When people impose themselves and cross my boundaries, and/or are dishonest, I will eventually cut off the relationship until it's remedied.  I have learned that they need not, and probably won't understand my needs, they just have to respect them if they want to be in a relationship with me, family included.  Because of this I automatically show the same consideration for others.

She could also consider if Jesus is in a compatible light with her path, because he most likely is to some degree, even if the modern churches aren't...praying to him would simply bring in his energies and assistance for her mother, as with different deities, angels, guides, animal spirits, etc. for their energies and assistance. 

My mother was quite poorly last year and  wasn't able to consent to any healing or prayer. What I did was say a silent prayer to Sant'Antonio and the Madonna (she's Catholic and they are the ones she always calls upon when in need) to help and watch over her.For me I had no problem doing this. In a way it was a link between me and my mother that helped.  I also gave her some Reiki for her greatest good.  Your friend just sending healing energies or praying that all will be well and for her mother's greatest good, leaving out religion or any personal belief, would probably be best in this case. Any healing done in love and light for the greatest good of the person being healed will help whether consent is given or not, in my opinion. 

I agree. If the daughter finds comfort in lighting a candle or saying a spell or sending energies or whatever, then I truly see no harm. I send my energies to an ailing friend regularly and it brings ME comfort. He has no objections, but I'm not so sure that's the most important. I would keep my interactions with the mother neutral and would privately practice my own path. Just my opinion...

I've prayed to YAHWEH, Jealousy, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, ect.  I believe it exists as much as any of the other gods/goddesses.  I just ask it to help this person, even thought I don't worship it or believe what it's followers promote.  

What happened was cruel.  The mother found a backhanded way to reject her daughter and there is little want for retaliation beacause her mother is ill.  Dealing with a very ill mother myself, I don't let her be cruel to me just because she is ill, I tell her cut it out or I just won't be there anymore.  

I'm tempted to say tell the mother how it hurt your feelings, but if she is anything like mine, she won't give two farts.

Yes, I have had something similar happen to me while visiting a family memeber in a hospital. I would avoid participating in any religious activity. If any religious questions pop up I wouldn't answer either. Find a reason not to get involved when visiting in the hospital.

No, this has never happened to me, I always understood that my parents (which are no longer alive) were considered Christian, so out of respect for their belief I would have never prayed to one of my deities in front of them because it was against their belief and I know it would have likely upset them more than anything.

Coming from a Christian upbringing I can definitely understand how a Christian would want a prayer done to their God/savior just as most beliefs would likely wish for their deity. When a person is ill often times, their belief or faith help them through it; having said that I can understand her mother wishing for a prayer to her deity. I'm not saying what she said was right but there's also a possibility that she's scared, she is ill and in the hospital and that should be taken into account as well. What she could do is call her mother's minister and ask that he visit her and pray with her. Staying neutral is the way to go, she's already sick so there's no need to turn it into a war of who's Gods should be prayed to, if any :) Her daughter can certainly send energy to her mother, it doesn't need to be spoken of as the outcome is all that matters.

Nail --> Head (I was trying to say that but as usual I was overly woooooooooordy ...lol)

it has with my family. they claimed their god was not my god so dont pray for them. i do anyways because my reasoning....faith. i told my father who is a baptist minster. "although you may think our gods are not the same it doesnt mean my prayers are different for yours. if i want to pray in the way i pray it shouldnt matter. i respect your beliefs but in return you should respect the fact that are beliefs are different in tolerance. because without tolerance this world will be at war with each other over petty things that we truely dont understand, we just think we do. by my faith that there is a God that is the only thing you should care about." his reply was nasty and uncalled for.

so i wont write it down.

my opinion.....she shouldnt care about the god whom she prays to. she should just be happy that she cares enough about her health to pray for her.

this to me is disrespect for her child. basically telling her....your prayers arent good enough for me. its cruel and spiteful.

when this happens to me next time, i dont care how pissed the person gets, i will pray for them because it shows i care.

not saying she doesnt care. but when that happens to you when someone is in the hospital it hurts, and you really have no idea what to do or say. it is her choice.

i had this happen to a good friend of mine who had cancer, she died and i felt helpless because how her mom explained it...."she had given up hope to live and was bitter because of it"

i guess i'm a bit of a hot head and if my mom told me that i probably would have pointed out "well do atheists not believing in your god make him any less real to you?"

I've never asked, or needed anyone to give me permission on how or what I pray about to my gods. If I am praying for someone to get better, I am not doing it just for them, I am doing it because I am also doing it for ME as I want them to get better. She should pray, or send energy, or whatever, how her own heart tells her to.


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