I know it has been forever since I have been here I have had a lot going on, as I am sure everyone else has too.

It has been a bad couple of years with poor health, but then my husband went to ER for backache, came home diagnosed with stage 4 Pancreatic Cancer.

I had to remain strong for him , but when he passed 2 months later, I fell apart. I am slowly adjusting to  my new  life.

I have given up cigarettes through hypno - therapy, and changed my meds - no more Narcotics of any kind. I have lost 50 lbs. Could use to lose 50 more :)

At this time I am not doing readings. I need this time to heal, to grow and to keep moving forward.

This is difficult for anyone.I am learning to keep my mind busy. Then I have less time to think about things, I don't want to think about.

To anyone reading this, if you have lost your life partner, Soulmate, Spouse, etc. then you can understand this.

If not, it may a bit harder to understand. It will be 17 months on December 24th.  It is still being processed sometimes. It does not seem like it could be real, but I know it is.

No one should ever be ashamed of their grief.

Life is too short to be drawn into drama from other peoples lives

If you feel your grief is stronger than you. Get Help. No reason to be self conscience.

Take time for yourself , take all the time you need. Grief shows its snarly head when you really wish it wouldn't :)

In the Check out or on a business call, or in the restaurant. Just let the tears roll. I am still learning this. I feel embarrassed, I know I shouldn't, and neither should you.

This was a hard one for me. I did not want to let myself cry- ever. I wanted to show how strong I was. That only works for a bit. Then you realize the tears are cleansing in their own way. That it isn't a bad thing to let the tears out. 

Eventually you will need to have little projects to keep your mind busy.

You will see, it will help , alongside therapy and the right medications.

I am on my way , baby steps ,  still moving forward.

Views: 111

Comment by Enigma on November 29, 2018 at 9:38am

That's a great picture. You two look so happy together.

Comment by Stormy Rayne on November 29, 2018 at 5:02pm

Thank you . We were very happy. 


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