Have you encountered someone who is 100% the one-upper? If you said you lost $100 at poker, they will one up you and say they lost $1,000. There was a discussion thread that asked why some people on Pagan Space didn't participate in the discussions. I tip toed around my number one issue with some discussions, but now I'm in a mood for a rant. A discussion is an exchange of ideas. Some discussions become a game of one-upmanship which really takes the bloom off the rose. If one person makes an observation or a comment, someone else is quick to turn the discussion on themselves and have to climb to the top of the heap as some pseudo-self-actualized intellectual. Suddenly, the discussion turns into a cat-fight, a flame fest, or a ridiculous circle-jerk of back-slapping.

I get it. There are some pagans out there with a dozen of degrees under their belt and are eager to show off. Well do it in your blog! Don't go into a discussion and bring down the party with the "more pagan than thou" vibe. We get it! You are a learned pagan with a lot to share.

I read one discussion where one person made a comment then got attacked by someone else because the person "did not know what they were talking about". The former poster did not participate in the discussion again and the latter person took control of the discussion with their ideas. Where was the exchange of ideas? Where was the respect?


The christians are trying to out do each other and we are doing the same. If there is a pagan out there that think we are better than most, then flash the spotlight on what pagans are doing differently. I really would like to know.

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I love coffee! lol
It's sad that you had to close a post due nonsense. It shouldn't be that way.
YAY! I agree. I knew a nurse who knew ALL the doctors personally, had done everything faster, longer, better, harder and more often than anyone else. Had treated, AND single handedly cured EVERY disease ever known to mankind, if she thought she could get away with it, she probably would have said she performed ALL the surgeries too! LOL Bottom line, her reputation has proceeded her and she can no longer find a job. It comes back to get them in the end.

Anyway, I hope I've never one upped you! I hate it too. And I really despise those posts in which the writer calls others "fluffy" or whatever and then goes on the to list, ad nauseum, ALL their alleged titles and ALL the books THEY read (which are far superior to ANY book YOU may have read), blah, blah, blah.And which authors are just HORRID and useless. And spewing their crap all over about how superior they are to everyone else.... GADS, who the f**k cares? They are really effective converstation stoppers.

Sometimes, it's kinda fun to call them on it. Ask them to elaborate and call them on their claims. I just did this awhile back and the person NEVER answered back! Imagine that! LOL

Anyway, KUDOS for your courage! I agree 100% (or should I say 1000%) LOLOL


Peace Lily
Peace Lily, you hit the nail on the head! There are some people who make good points and provide good resources (websites, books, etc.). Then you have others that like to bait the crowd with blanket statements. And when they get challenged, then WATCH OUT.

BTW, you are not guilty of the offense. LOL ;-)
Yeah, I don't remember. Sorry, it's Monday and so far almost nothing ahs gone right! LOL
It's good to see you back, Dear Friend!

Like you, I don't get involved in the threads that become toxic. But on the flip side of things, I find it becoming increasingly difficult to get involved in many threads that had the potential to be really good discussions. Somehow by the 2nd page someone hijacks the thread.
LOL, Lady Kate! I' have been in those situations as we all have I think. Here's one of my favorite stories of one upmanship. I have a patient who is a quadrplegic as a result of a car accident. She had an aide at one time who was quite a one upper. She had asked my patient HOW she had become a quadriplegic. After my patient told her story.... you guessed it! This aide, who happened to be unscarred and walking around on her two legs said..... "That ain't nothing!" And of course, started to tell her about HER car wreck. Not only infuriating, but just down right cruel and crass.

Yeah, ALL one uppers need to watch that videa and see themselves, LOL.

Peace Lily
The "Stop Following" button is a great way to pull out of a discussion that has gone nowhere fast. It's too bad that some of us have to use it more often than we may like.

Great video post, Lady Kate. I appreciate the chuckle! :-)
Yes, I have used the stop following a number of times myself. Works wonders! LOL
Now that is a great diagram!


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