For those of us who will enjoy cakes and ale at ritual...

To  paraphrase W.C. Fields, "I don't drink water, because fish screw in  it."

As Ben Franklin  said:  In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is
freedom, in water there is bacteria.

In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we drink  1  liter of water each day,  at  the end of the year we would have
absorbed  more  than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli, (E. coli) - bacteria
found in  feces.  In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of  poop..

However,  we do NOT run that risk when drinking wine &  beer  (or  tequila, rum, whiskey or other liquor)  because alcohol has to go
through a purification process  of boiling, filtering and/or  fermenting.

Water  = Poop,
Ale  =  Health

Therefore, it's better to drink alcohol and talk  stupid, than to drink water and be
full of shit.

There is no need to thank me for this valuable  information:  I'm  doing it as a public service!

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A long time ago, way back in history
When all there was to drink was nothing but cups of tea
Along came a man by the name of Charlie Mops
And he invented a wonderful drink and he made it out of hops


oh he ought to be an admiral, a sultan, or a king

And to his praises we shall always sing

Look what he has done for us, he's filled us up with cheer

lord bless Charlie Mops,

The man who invented beer
The Jury's Bar, the Clancy's Pub, the Hole in the Wall as well
One thing you can be sure of, it's Charlie's beer they sell
So come on all me lucky lads at eleven O'clock ye stop
For five short seconds, remember Charlie Mops
One, two, three, four, five


A barrel of malt, A bushel of hops, you stir it around with a stick,
The kind of lubrication to make your engine tick.
Forty pints of wallop a day will keep away the quacks.
It's only eight pence ha'penny and one and six in tax
One, two, three, four, five

The lord bless Charlie Mops!
Love it!!


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