I'm not sure if this topic has come up before. Anyway, I've always had trouble connecting with women. I usually don't get good vibes from them, so they sort of "turn me off" (friendship-wise). In fact, most of my friends throughout my whole life have been men (well, some were boys), and female friendships usually end with a fight (or many fights). Now that I've gotten a little more spiritual, I'd like to maybe find a goddess or two to sort of connect with (like a patron). It hasn't been hard for me to feel drawn to the gods, but I have absolutely no pull towards any goddesses.

I don't like it because I feel like I should connect with both, but I have no idea how. Does anyone else have this problem? Any advice? Maybe even an explanation? Thanks.

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I assume you're female yourself?

If so, what you're feeling is not unusual.  Some women identify more with guys than other women or their personality is geared more toward how guys communicate than women.

I'm female and on two other boards I visit, one is mostly occupied by females, the other mostly males.

I tend to be direct, blunt, not afraid to challenge ideas or defend my position and be irreverent.

In the mostly female board, I've been reported multiple times to the mods by other posters, been told that I'm callous and cruel and that I've hurt other people's feelings, that I've offended people.

Acting the exact same way on the mostly male board?  Not a single report against me.

On mostly female boards, I have to not rock the boat, not be blunt, not be direct; I have to sacrifice part of who I am in order to get along with the other women of the group.

Needless to say, I spend more time on the mostly men board.

Religiously, the goddesses I worship and identify with are seldom love goddesses or goddesses having to do with stereotypically 'female' things.

Thank you.

Yes, I'm female. I have the same issues as well, but they usually occur in person (although it has happened online). Other women don't seem to like it when I don't sugarcoat anything, which seems like lying to me. I'd prefer to be honest, which I guess men can relate to.

I'd prefer to be honest, which I guess men can relate to.

I think you mean men can relate to you being direct.  Men are no more honest than anyone else.

In my experience, most women beat around the bush when trying to make a point or tell people something (like news, most of the time). I see it almost as dishonest, like a white lie. It's like the opposite of exaggeration.

There is nothing dishonest about beating around the bush as long as the person finally gets to the point.

Mommy beating around the bush with little Timmy: 

Mommy: Honey, remember what I said about closing the kitchen door?

Timmy: Yes.

Mommy: and you know Rover is really excitable and happy to see people.

Timmy: Yes.

Mommy: Well, the door was left open and Rover was all excited and he got out.  And I’m sorry baby, but he ran out in the street and a car hit him.  He’s gone to Heaven. 


Mommy being direct with little Timmy:

Mommy:  Timmy? You left the kitchen door open again and Rover got squashed by a car in the street.  He’s dead.  Sorry, baby.

Well no and yes...no because I've always been goddess worthy...I may be crude at times from dealing with men...but I have my totally feminine side...men are only true to their own kind so although I may not show it very often I'm true to mine.

I don't consider myself unworthy of them. I just think they haven't taken a particular interest in me, or are indifferent.

I think the key thing is patience, not all god/desses will show any interest until the moment you need them in your life.

you don't have to connect to the divine feminine. You can stick to male gods.

I know, but I'd like to connect with at least one goddess. It doesn't feel right to me, personally, to just connect with the male gods.

Thanks, though.

Nobody here can help you connect. You'll have to wait for it.

Maybe you would identify more with goddesses that represent more of a 'male' type quality? So don't look toward a goddess that might represent love or any 'feminine' type values. Perhaps a goddess that displays some of the same qualities that you see in yourself? Many goddesses give off that 'motherly' type vibe to me which I think might turn some people off. When the time is right you might connect with a goddess, if not---no big deal! You aren't doing anything wrong by not choosing to connect with one.


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