I had a conversation with a friend the other day about the subtleties of romance, and I thought that I would bring it here for discussion's sake, since February is the Hallmark season of love, or some nonsense.
My generation saw the advent of the internet, internet dating, "I met my boyfriend on MySpace", "I send my girl an email in chatspeak to tell her 'I luv u'," etc. But what ever happened to a sweet, hand-written love note? If you lover has to leave early for work, does s/he leave a short note on the pillow next to yours? Or does s/he txt your Blackberry? Even phone calls have been substituted for a quick, three letter text message. 'ILU.'
What side of the fence are you on? Hand-written notes and a phone call to say "I'm thinking of you"? Or a quick text to say "ILU & b home 4 dnnr"?
How do you feel about internet dating of the long-distance variety? Can you love someone you've only seen on webcam?
I look forward to seeing the standpoints people take here. =] Technology can be a great asset, or it can really foul things up. After all "I saw that girl flirting in your MySpace comments!"
Text messages are convenient, and if you have the T9 auto-complete thing, it makes you seem less illiterate. XD
I'm a huge advocate for the love letter, but, honestly... some people have handwriting like someone taped a pen to a cat and chased it with a vacuum cleaner. XD
I agree on the internet dating front. I've met guys that I've talked to on MySpace, and after meeting have become close, but I've never done the long distance thing. I'm not sure I could. Physical contact and chemistry is a huge factor.
Every Valentines for the last 18 years I give my husband a "hand written" letter, usually a poem I've written, to tell him how much I love him. We have all of them along with many more, some lovey dovey, some not so lovey dovey. We wouldn't take any thing for them. They are precious to us.
I know at least 3 people in my physical environment , and more otherwise, who got to know each other online.
The internet offers many very creative ways to show affection.
.) create playlist and send link.
.) (Postal service) wear T-shirt for one day and send. does a lot of work. chemistry rules.
.) create a photo gallery of your town and the nature, lock and send invitation
.) modify a picture, send
.) write the freaking love letter and scan it, convert to .pdf or .jpg and send via mail. handwriting is important.
otherwise pick a postcard, write on the back, scan both sides and send.
*SIGH* My own handwriting is elaborate but I use old French letters so love's labour is lost.
.) create a webpage . I know someone who got presented for birthday with a domain. It was very unique and considerate, since it was a typing error of a website he visited often.
Boyz, humble advice. Better not be too daring, even if asked for maybe half of what you think is hot. Applies on girls as well, who knows. I am a fan of the subtle hint when it comes to that, but I know I can not speak for everyone.
the internet offers many free possibilities. I do some of the above for individuals who are not target of my adoration, and none complained. They liked it.
I do not put my romantic needs on display, males seem overchallenged enough with remembering my birthday. Also the few times I did ask for some it was just too disappointing and more a heartbreak than a pleasure, since I do not like clichees to much. Anyone who pays any attention should know my idea of style or taste well enough to not grace me with pink plush or crimson carnelians or whatever those are called.
I myself have never met anyone online whom I met IRL and was all excited about. But I have a weakness for what I consider good writing, so I would not say it is impossible.
If I have something important to tell my SO, whether it be to simply tell him that I love him or something else, I always write a letter. It is more personal and I feel it gets the point across more effectively..
To me a hand written letter is the most special one gift that one can give to another. What good are words typewritten on a piece of paper? I still have the last little note my mom wrote to me before she passed away 18 yrs ago. And that is so special as she wrote it and I feel so close to her when I read it and I'm feeling down. If it's handwritten, you can feel the emotion from the handwriting and also on the paper. Typewritten to me means you really don't have time nor want to set a little time aside for me to tell me your feelings. I even have the last Yule card my dad sent to me, and just seeing the words Love, Dad in his handwriting are special. Call me old fashioned, but it's something that can't be replaced if something should happen to a loved one. Plus if it's from a family member, it can be handed down & still will have special meaning. Blessings :-)