Hi, a little about me first. I'm 28 and have a wife and 3 kids. I'm 5'8" and weigh in around 270-280lbs. My wife is also overweight (about 5'6" 320+lbs). My kids are doing fine, the twin girls are almost a year and my son is almost 2 (they are 10 months apart). My job doesn't give me a whole bunch of opportunity to exercise, I sit behind a desk all from 8:45a- 5:30p Monday - Friday. I sorta get a lunch, but the company I work for is so small, I just eat while I'm working. I'm always tired. I try keeping a schedule, going to bed around 10 or 11 and getting up at 7-7:30, but I'm not always keeping it, because sometimes I'm just not tired at night. I know I need to exercise and start eating right, but with 3 kids at home, it's hard. She wants a break from the day of watching kids and by the time the kids are down for bed, I want a mental break. We also don't have alot of time for cooking and junk food is soo much cheaper than healthy food, it's just easier to buy the frozen pizza, through some "beef" crumbles (oh, yes, we're vegetarians, too) on top and pop it in the oven. I really don't know what to do. I know I'm tired because I don't exercise, but I don't exercise because I'm tired. I want to get out and start walking, but everytime I do, I find a reason not to and... yea. My wife wants to lose the weight too, but, like me, she lacks the energy to get out and do it. What do we do? I'm concerned that it's affecting my spirtual path too, because my body is not in harmony with the rest of me. Please help.


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Hi WillowFox,
I know how you feel, I had perfect weight until I hit 26, and then it all changed. I have been trying everything and nothing worked then last March I went to my doctor, I tried to exercise but my body hurt too much, I was so fatigued that some days I could not move. At night sleep eluded me. So March 2009 at the age of 37 I told my doc I really needed some help but did not want surgery to alter my body. She blessed me with a little pill called Phentermine. I weighed in at 210 and at 5’6 I felt disconnected. The pill was not meant to be a miracle but it gave me energy, and emotional boost, and controlled my appetite. Knowing I had help also made me decide to start hiking; I loaded my pack down with water and headed for the steep hills. Yes it hurt, yes I felt foolish having to rest every little bit but that exercise along with adding more protein to my diet made a major difference. Nut bars are my friend seems they replenish your energy and hold off your hunger. Within a month I dropped 20 lbs. The weight loss slowed a little after that but it is now December 2009 and I have lost a total of 60 lbs. I also have a ton more energy, my body does not hurt as much as it used to, and I learned by accident that a heavy pack going uphill will do things to a woman’s back end that a squat never could. I can now go for tough hikes that travel up to 12 miles and only sit down once. I feel more like myself than I have for a long time and finally feel like me again.

Good luck
Best advice - take it one step at a time. If you try to completely overhaul your life in one go you won't be able to keep up with it. Easiest to start with would probably be your diet. I know how you feel, my son is 19 months. I've found a lot of great easy quick healthy recipes online. Start with some small changes, maybe each of you commits to cooking dinner once a week, that's 2 healthy meals. Once you get that rhythm down, bump it up to 2 each, then 3. You'll be eating 6 good dinners, and of course you need to keep one night to be lazy and splurge. Keep a box of granola bars at your office and eat one at least every couple of hours. That will keep you from overindulging at lunch. Try to be active, but don't worry about exercising at the beginning. That will just put more stress on you. Once you get comfortable with the cooking, then start thinking about exercise. If you can afford it, get WiiFit Plus. It's awesome! At the beginning you can just play the games to get you moving, then gradually move up to the workouts. I know it sounds like at lot to accomplish, but just focus on the first step.
I am a fan of the WiiFit idea. You can do it right from home and whenever it fits into any schedule! Plus as the kids get older they'll love it!!!
Hello WillowFox and congrats on taking the first step...Knowing you need a change..The most important thing to remember is slow and easy..You did not gain your weight in oneday...so it won't come off in one day..Start by giving up one thing..sugar, white bread, white rice or white potatoes....if you cut your sugar and increase your protein..eggs, beans, veggies..your are getting a jump start..and more protein more energy..good energy..and exercise is easy too...take the stairs..walk the kids..buy a used bike and ride short trips...Good luck and last...have a cheat day..nothing extreme..but little at first, helps with frustration.
Stay away from diet pills!!! I don't care what Dr. prescribes them. There are some foods and herbs that will do the same thing- they are a lot better for you and not addictive. You can chew sugar free gum(without aspartame) and that will help with cravings. Health food stores are great places; and sometimes the people who work there are pagans.
Like Dee said why not take the kids & wife for a walk? Even 20 min. at a time will make a difference, the fresh air will do all of you good; it will knock the kids out earlier at bedtime- and its a lot more fun than just watching the kids.
If your body doesn't want to sleep at 10 or 11; don't force it. You could use that time for yourself- light candles, incense; meditate,read, whatever it takes to relax you. Most people eat because they are stressed- then when they gain weight, they get more stressed- then eat more.
Remember- the kids are fine now; but it won't be long before they do the same as you and your wife. Now is the perfect time to get started before its 5 people trying to lose weight. You can do it!! Once you get started, it'll get easier.

Hi WillowFox,

Your changes must be the result of very high priorities. Just going on a diet won't work. You must be willing to make a lifestyle change forever. It is something that you must do from now on. That being said, it doesn't have to happen overnight either. The stressful part is figuring out where to begin. It's clear that you need some guidance on how to compose your food to work for you. Maybe some of your relaxing periods can be reading up on nutritional principles. The Idiot's Guide to Total Nutrition is a good one for starting. Every home should have a book like this on their shelf. I find it interesting that Americans do so much study on so many things to increase our productivity, but few of us ever study the most important knowledge for life: how to eat.


Since you don't have much energy, jumping into exercise will be the tough. The greatest upset to your current routine will be the changes that your diet will require, and until some of the weight comes off, you may not feel much energy for exercise. So you can either start with very light exercise - just some walking - or you can put that goal off for a bit later, but don't forget it entirely. Try setting a goal weight at which you start more exercise. Remember to start any exercise routine slowly, until your heart and skeletal muscles get stronger, or you may injure yourself and end up stuck in a bed for weeks.


Rule of Thumb #1: Eat mostly food with a low glycemic index. Some great suggestions have been presented. I agree that you should cut back on sugars and refined starches. Reducing the overall glycemic index of what you are eating will do your insulin levels a world of good. Your house should have on its bookshelf a guide to the glycemic index of common foods. Also read the information on the website of the Whole Grains Council. Most of your carbs will be whole grain form now on.


Rule of Thumb#2: Eat more often. You will likely have to start using your Sunday to cook meals in advance and pack them away. The suggestion that you and your wife trade a cooking day is a good one - then there are two cooking days during the week. Prepare meals in which the whole thing could fit in the cupped palms of two hands. Include some protein in every meal, but at least half of the meal should be vegetables (either raw or very lightly cooked). If you can prevent your insulin levels from spiking during the day, your body will not get the signal that it has to store energy.


Rule of Thumb #3: If you don't count it, you will never know how much you eat. Start keeping a food diary. This should be a record of everything you consume, including your water. Make a column for the food name, one for the amount you ate, one for the protein, one for fats, and one for carbohydrates. When you eat something, write it down, write down how much you ate, and how much P, F & C you consumed for each food. Remember to increase your values if you eat more of each food. Your house should have a scale that can measure to the ounce (digital is best), and measuring spoons and cups. Most nutrient values will come from the packaging, but if you eat mostly fresh foods (which is ideal), you will have to use a reference manual. You can buy one at a book store, or you can get a free one at USDA. Once you know what you are eating, you will be one your way to knowing how to apply the nutrition principles you will learn through study.


You can do this! Above all, don't allow your worry to prevent you from getting started. Once the ball gets rolling, it will be easier for you to keep it rolling. Becoming a witch didn't happen overnight either, did it? And you are right, knowing how to keep your body healthy is 100% part of your sacred path. All pagans want to show respect for nature, but doesn't that include respect for your natural body and those of your family? Good luck!

Walking during your lunch break is a great way to start. Then you can eat a nutritious lunch st your desk after your break is over. Eat while working. That's what I used to do when I was physically able. Now things are different and I sure miss my walks! Good luck to you WillowFox and please keep us posted. Blessings!
As a runner and coach (not right now) and a nurse, if you lived in Spokane I bet we could work out an exercise program that would really help.  But without actually seeing where your at, what you can and willing to do and how you progress, it's really not responsible to try to do this via the internet.  But find something you love to do.  If i's just hard work, how long will you stick with it?  I recommend a walking program, changing to light jogs mixed in (use the "talk" test..when you to winded to talk easy you walk unitl you recover) then running.  Because once your "into" it, it becomes a form of play.  No matter HOW busy you are, you can find 30-60 minutes a day to do this.  Plus you can do it with others making it fun.  So I recommend a running/walking club in your area.  Also maybe a hiking club.  You can find hiking clubs everywhere at meetup.com.  Great exercise, fun people and a chance to commune with Mother Earth.   The other thing is diet which is to long for this post. Eat healthy foods and 3,500 calories = 1 pound.  Eat 3,500 calories less then you burn, you lose 1 pound.  Eat 3,50 calories more, well we know.  Blessings Willow

I know exactly what you mean.  I'm 27 with the best intentions of living a healthier life but with a boyfriend that does not (not that that should be an excuse - only when we do have time to spend together i find myself living his life style (beer and pizza) then leaving him for another hour to talk the dogs for a run.)  I work 40+ hrs a week - and I am tired mentally and physically when i get home.  And yes...healthy food is way to expensive on a pay check to pay check budget.  The whole life change to be healthy just seems overwhelming and makes me tired to think of it.  I also try to stick to a schedule.  But it's conflicted.  I am a night person so going to be early never works out, I just toss and turn for hours.  Not being a morning person makes it hard to wake up at 5 am to work out, walk the dogs, etc before heading off to work.

I could afford to lose a few pounds but I am not severely overweight.  My concern is really just feeling good about myself, having a life that incorporates health into it (I know that with this the weight will come off.)  I also feel that I am on my feet so much (I walk a fast pace and lift up to 70lbs daily) that if I could just getting my eating right I could get the pounds off just by living...but that goes back to the being able to afford balanced diets, finding time to eat and not snacking on junk food through out the day (my clinic (Schultz Veterinary Clinic) always has awesome treats in the break-room -cakes/pies/donuts...

Its a daily struggle that right now I am having a very difficult time getting control of.

I once tried a lose 10lbs in 10 days diet.  Haha.  It was a diet my parents used and it worked for them.  It is also just a start off diet, not one meant to be used long term (not healthy.)  I fallowed the diet perfectly.  And i got results.  The problem was that I think it was made for people who have a desk job, which I do not.  After working all day, eating there 3 small meals, plus two small snacks and then coming home to do the scheduled work out...well after 3 days I was so hungry and lethargic I was seeing stars and stumbling, crying cause I just wanted more food!  My boyfriend at the time simply got up and put together another bean and chicken burrito for me on my plate and put it in front of me.  That was the end of the 10 day diet.


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